BAD PERSONALITY, OR JUST A BAD DAY

The last time you had an exchange with someone that didn’t go well and left you wondering, ‘do they have a bad personality, or was it a bad moment in a bad day?’

It’s a fair question, but only if you never see them again.

If you see them regularly, you know.

So do they. What’s the difference?

You. You are the difference.

Let’s say you’re having a talk with someone who you know has something they need to say.

You know this because they always have something to say.

Other people have listened to them and come away wanting, but you think to yourself, ‘it’s them.’

After you have your talk, you know: It’s the speaker and now you’ve had your moment.

You come away with the same feeling others told you about.

Bad personality, not a bad day.

It’s hard to admit it, hard to think you can’t find something good about the exchange you had.

It’s harder when you get all the blame and no credit when you didn’t do anything.

But you listen either way.

 

Would You Listen Again?

Even nice people need to vent their frustrations now and then.

Creative types find something to do with their feelings, their loneliness, their sense of being left out.

Kids get a break because they’re kids and it’s all new to them, so go ahead and have a meltdown.

Adults? We know better, right?

Baby boomers are old enough to know how these things work.

We’ve been schooled in self-control, learned patience, but somehow there’s a group that goes off on a regular basis.

They make their faces, raise their voices, and it looks so practiced, like an act.

Do they do drills in the mirror for their happy face, their angry face, their ‘I told you so’ face, their ‘why can’t you understand normal thinking’ face.

Do they do voice drills for the shrill sound, the ‘what did I just say’ sound, the ‘that’s enough out of you’ message?

My favorite is the angry face paired with threatening tone.

Seeing it and hearing it from a soft old man is entertaining, which comes from me, a soft old man.

I’ve learned, in my years of work, travel, and family, that angry old men barking like mad dogs is not a good look, not a ‘results driven’ act.

What it is is pathetic, the howling echo of one leaving the party sooner than later and doesn’t know.

 

Don’t Fool Yourself Into Pity

If you are not a fool, or a wise man, but something else, what is it?

There are some names we can’t call ourselves, names better left to others.

Legend, Super Star, Exalted, and so on.

Hang those on yourself in public and you’ll find more than a few observers willing to dispute your tag.

They’ve done more, made more, been there and done that twice.

There are exceptions:

 

Before you give up and give in to a bad day and let it rip no matter who can hear or see you on your tirade, keep this in mind:

People who don’t know you will never want to know any more about you and they to away thinking you’ve got a bad personality, a defective link between your brain and what comes out of your mouth.

Unless you are a professional sports coach arguing a bad call.

Then you get to kick things over, tear things up, and give a rational interview afterwards.

They do it for the team, for the sport, and to show the refs they’d better be more certain of their calls if they don’t want another dose of the same.

How does the team react?

“I’m glad he’s on our side.”

There are limits to a bad day, and if you don’t know that before you go off in front of strangers, it’s more of a bad personality, a poor choice to go along with other poor choices.

An old fool who thinks he’s wise decides to teach a young whippersnapper a lesson might come up short of their goals.

Any fool who doesn’t read the room correctly might get dropped.

No one wants to see that.

 

PS:

Someone who gets dropped in their steps, who gets slapped down, will need help getting back up.

PSS:

The big question once they get back on their feet is, ‘Did they learn anything?’