HELPING THE EMERGENCY RESCUE

Or, How To Tell The Difference Between Yoga And A Case For Emergency Rescue.

The gym I belong to is full of classes.

Usually they happen in a dance studio with window walls on one side and mirrors on the other.

It’s the usual schedule of jumping around with a wired up instructor, lifting Styrofoam weights, or punching imaginary opponents. Add spin class. Don’t want to forget that.

And yoga.

Yoga is so popular the class moves into the basketball court.

It’s the yoga that caught my attention. Why? Because it’s hard.

One yoga class was hard, the next harder. My respect for yoga grew faster than my pledge to avoid another class.

Combine yoga with the gym buddy phenomena of helping each other lift, not just standing by for your turn. Who needs a spotter on a weight machine? Free weights, yes, machine, no.

But they do it anyway.

I took a look one morning into the corner of the weight room and saw a man on the floor with another man kneeling next to him.

Great, yoga buddies. There’s not enough room in the dance studio, or the basketball court, now yoga invades the gym floor too?

If you’ve seen the amount of bodily fluids and other fluids on the gym floor you’d never lay down on it and let your face touch.

But this guy apparently believed yoga would save him from a case of athletes foot on his face?

Who’s gonna argue?

Other people racked weights and pulled cables around the yoga master.

The closer I got, the better I saw what was really going on.

What Emergency Rescue Looks Like.

The man had collapsed to the floor and his pal was checking on him. His face wasn’t on the floor, either. He laid the side of his face on a towel he’d vomited on. It was a good clue to what followed.

Right away I saw a chance to do good. Again.

The Sunday Oregonian ran a Steve Duin column on life saving. The life saved in his story belonged to a life saving instructor. It happens.

Monday’s man down looked like a candidate for boomerpdx life saving. I got down with him, kneeling opposite the other guy and taking a pulse.

With no pulse I was prepped to flip him over and pound the shit out of his chest with CPR compressions.

The puking eliminated the breath of life part, but I would have cleared his mouth and tilted his head the way instructors teach.

A dentist lady came over and took charge.

Emergency Rescue Priority.

Pulse was strong and steady, but he couldn’t get up. He was responsive, but stuck on the ground heaving.

The next few minutes included a 911 call, firemen, and an ambulance.

Jump from Monday’s emergency rescue to Saturday and the victim is riding a stationary bike like nothing happened. I passed by, then doubled back.

“Was that you on the ground Monday?”

“It was me.”

“And here you are? How are you feeling?”

“Feeling good.”

“Right. So you didn’t die?”

“Hardly.”

“Was it a close call?  I was the guy taking your pulse and monitoring your breathing, bringing the emergency crew in.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s okay. You know you’re not the first guy I’ve saved here.”

“Really?”

“That’s right. Now I’ve got two on my belt. So what life threatening thing did the docs find with you? The last guy had a heart attack and spent a week in the hospital.”

“I had vertigo. My new glasses and sit-ups didn’t work well together. The graduated tri-focals took me down.”

“Vertigo?”

“Vertigo.”

“Vertigo can be life threatening.”

“Maybe, but I was already down. It was the safest place to be.”

“If I didn’t find your pulse I was ready to flip you and pound your chest in.”

“Really?”

“Not for vertigo. Are you sure that was all there was? Maybe a little stroke?”

“Nope. Spent a day in the hospital under observation. Nothing but vertigo.”

“So I didn’t really save your life. I can’t claim a life saved from vertigo. Maybe a half-life saved?”

The Embarrassment Of Emergency Rescue.

The more we talked the more we got into why some people react well and others don’t. I explained my first save in the gym. I didn’t call 911 or do CPR, but I kept another man alive by keeping him down instead of going home, sitting down, and dying there.

“Well that’s good, but no way I was going home. I couldn’t even stand up.”

While we talked the man I take credit for saving in 2012 walked up. In one of those sweet coincidences of life I stood there with two guys I’d seen in trouble.

I introduced them and we started negotiating how much life saving credit I could bank.

“Well you can’t take credit for saving a life that wasn’t in jeopardy. I was having a heart attack so I’ll give you that. Vertigo?”

“Okay. Half a life saved?”

“I had vertigo.”

“You could have drowned in vomit.”

“He’s got a point.”

“But someone else was already there and your head was turned.”

“Fine. How about quarter credit? I’m taking quarter credit just because everyone else ignored you.”

“I’m good with that.”

“I mean, look at everyone on the weights. None of them jumped. I did. How about a third credit for life saving.”

After The Fact Emergency Rescue.

We went over it a few more times and I ended up with the quarter credit.

So what’s the point? Make an effort, baby boomer. Keep yourself ready to act. And if you feel panic, calm the hell down and respond. If you don’t know what to do, call for help and make it loud.

If you happen to see the revived person, look them in the eye and say thanks. With no emergency there’d be no emergency rescue.

You get a quarter point for showing up and dealing with your own panic in the moment.

How many scores have you made in the game of emergency rescue?