BEACH LIGHTHOUSE AT WORK FOR SAFER SEAS

A beach lighthouse is essential for ocean swimmers.

It’s also important for goofy people trying to catch a wave on a boogie board surrounded by surfers.

And drifting further down and further down on a current.

Then there’s the power swim to shore. Or else.

Before you get down and out on a boogie board, look to the shoreline for the beach lighthouse.

My lighthouse looked like she was walking the widow’s walk while I was floundering in rough seas.

The goal was catching a wave and not leaving anyone a widow.

What’s worse than reading a story about another idiot getting dragged under the surf, getting dragged out, and CPR’d back to life?

Not much.

So there I was, further out than any surfer, and kicking for the finish line beach in behind crashing waves I couldn’t catch a ride on.

How It Started

Before challenging Davy Jones on his turf, fuel up with the right stuff.

What’s the right stuff?

Since you’re going to the world of fish and more, there’s only one choice:

What could go wrong after the best sushi ever?

If there are any doubts, go bigger:

No way you’re going to capsize if you get tanked up with this fuel.

There’s no rule book, or guarantees, but fish to fish is a good insurance policy.

Was I fishy enough?

Ask The Expert

I took the ‘no comment’ attitude as a green light.

With a load of raw fish onboard I was no different than other creatures of the sea?

Except the surfers.

These people were on a surf beach, catching waves, walking back and forth on their surf boards while riding waves.

One surfer had a kid on it with him.

They made it all look so easy from the beach.

2

My kid and I took boogie boards into the breaking waves and paddled out.

The surfers seemed to catch waves and head straight at us before making a turn.

My initial plan, if this was beach bully bullshit, was whipping up my boogie board to block the surfboard from hitting me in the face, then pounce on the surfer in pissy fury.

Luckily that was a plan not needed, but just in case.

My wife, granddaughter, and daughter in-law, watched their men not catch a wave.

I never came close. But I did drift further away. That’s when my private beach lighthouse turned on the big light.

3

My son headed for shore; I decided to kick parallel then turn in to catch a wave.

It was a good plan except for one thing: I didn’t seem to move any closer to our chairs or the shore.

So I poured on the coals and started kicking like a sushi stuffed jelly fish.

And still not going anywhere.

I watched the surfers between me and the shore and noticed my daughter in-law talking to one of them on his way to the parking lot.

Instead of leaving, the guy turned around and headed back into the ocean.

Straight at me, but in reverse.

After a while he got out to where I was and asked if I was okay.

Was I?

In one of those moments where you question your conditioning to do things from start to finish, I felt like I had enough endurance and common sense to find land.

“Amanda wants me to ask if you’re feeling okay.”

The Beach Lighthouse At Work

I told my surfer messenger I was good, then used sushi power and aimed for my daughter in-law beach lighthouse.

She stood at the shoreline watching me inch up and make the turn.

The lifeguard station was close. If things turned sour I could count on them?

Or, I could abandon my boogie board and swim in.

But the hard kick was doing it down the homestretch.

On a daily basis I worry about getting enough exercise.

Not yesterday. With no panic, I dug deep, then deeper, and held steady.

Once on shore I pretended like I was embarrassed that a surfer checked on me.

“Man, you’re embarrassing me in front of all my new friends.”

I was channeling Ben Affleck from his Super Bowl commercial when Jennifer Lopez pulled up.

“Guys, I gotta go.”

Was I tired? Just right.

Was I embarrassed? Not for a second.

Did my beach lighthouse inspire me?

More than I can say, but I will say this:

My wife, kid, daughter in-law, and grand baby worried about me.

They brought me in safe and sound.

I dragged out of the crashing waves like Aquaman? Prince Namor? Neptune? Poseidon?

All of them and more. Man vs Sea.

I’m catching the next wave.