WORKOUT MESSAGES, SECRET MEANINGS

The best workout advice ever given?

“Listen to your body.”

This is especially true as we age, at least for those who believe in aging. More likely ‘listen to your body’ is the best excuse for no workout.

“I can’t lift today. I listened to my body and it said drink beer and eat trash.”

I’ve heard that when I listened to my body before a workout and figured it was talking to someone else.

What else should you listen to during a workout?

On the incline bench I did a series of lifts, heavy and light, fast and slow. I’m body building, you know, like a the body man in an auto garage is a customizer.

We’re both trying to work a few dents out.

Toward the end of my incline time a fellow lifter came over and volunteered to spot me if I wanted to lift heavier, which I didn’t.

“I saw what you just did,” he said. “You can lift a lot more. I’ll spot you after we load the bar up.”

I explained the body building angle and how I hoped muscle confusion would promote growth where I wanted it. I think I confused him in the process.

I was using the light lifting as warm ups for heavy, which isn’t as heavy as it seems.

Crossing The Workout Bar

One of the strong guys who works at staying strong told me I needed to do dumbbell flat presses to build my bench strength.

So that’s what I do.

The dumbbell rack is split by an iron column right at the seventy five pound mark on the left. The right side starts with a pair of eighty pounders and adds five until the last huge 120lb dumbbells.

“Once you get to the other side of the post, then you’re on to something,” they said.

After an hour of warm up and lifting I was ready. I picked the sixty pounders up, sat on the bench, hefted them to my chest while I laid back, and pumped out eight reps.

I call it my Mariota set.

No one came to help, but I noticed my gym bully was spying. I hoped he’d step up to an equal lift so I could tell him it was too much for him.

After a rest period I pulled the seventy pounders off the rack and pushed out six reps.

For the big finale I crossed the bar and loaded up with the eighty pounders. Another gym guy gave them a look and said, “You could just press me instead.”

I shook him off and huffed a few times, laid back, and did four reps before dropping the weight on the bouncy floor.

Eighty pounds in each hand, one hundred sixty over my face, and it felt so good.

Say what you will about exercise, and knuckleheads, and muscle heads, they’re all in the gym for a workout, but the gray haired guys who take it personally are the ones to watch.

I felt pretty good about myself just before a guy who might be older and in better shape locked onto the chin up bar and knocked out an easy twenty all the way and all the way down.

Could he be working a few dents out too? Probably.

How about you?