TRUST, HOPE, THEN EXPLOIT

If you believe in the power of trust, hope, and faith, and you should, what could go wrong?

Do it right and you’ll find yourself in the company of others with the same beliefs.

At first.

Then time reveals other plans.

In the beginning you all look alike in your Sunday clothes, then someone’s wearing their Sunday clothes the other days of the week too.

Who remembers Sunday clothes, church clothes? It was the one time during the week to look your best.

Your Momma never looked better, your Daddy is handsome, and everyone is cleaned up for church.

In a way it sets the standard for trust, hope, and faith.

Any white man wearing a suit must be decent based on early training; one of us.

And this is the painful part, the betrayal part, the you don’t really matter enough part.

 

Who Matters More Than You

In the larger world we need to hold onto our identity, or who we identify as.

Me? I identify as a husband and father with a good record of being just that.

My wife thinks I’m annoying, my kids think I’m a big show off, but my dog thinks I’m just right.

I’m going with the dog and trust, hope, she will sway the others.

She’s such a good girl that I know she’ll get the job done. If not, I’ve got a dog suit to help.

Without getting too technical here, we are our own best cheerleaders. Who knows us better than ourselves?

Sure, you’re going to meet people who want you to think they know what’s best for you.

Credential check: Are they a doctor or a fiduciary?

If not, then why would you listen to them?

I’ll tell you why: When someone knows which buttons to push to elicit a fear response, you grow fearful.

Then you hear it again and again and again until you either succumb to the fear, or reject the one trick fear pony.

But what about being your best cheerleader? You might have to regain the trust, hope, and faith you wasted.

 

When The Reality Sets In

At the beginning of 2017 my trust, hope, and faith was at a low ebb.

The reality of cancer treatment was on my doorstep and knocking hard.

I answered.

That was my only choice after coming down with HPV16 neck cancer, commonly called the most embarrassing of all cancers.

Why? Because you get it from going downtown on a past partner. Married men who get it decades after the inciting events have to explain it to their wives and kids.

One way is telling them you were a HEAVY smoker and that’s why the neck cancer. Hey, it’s not lung cancer.

In other words, lie about it.

Or you tell them the truth and get, “Ewww, you were one of those guys?”

To which you respond, “Ask your mother.”

Awkward?

 

Just as cancer radiation and chemo started we got a new President. So what, you ask?

I can tell you straight up that the man in the White House has a greater reach when you’re feeling down and out.

Me: I’ll go through the fire, but at least we’ve got a guy who understands the hardship.

That was with the old President. The new one was not of the same character.

One would plug you into life saving efforts, the other? Meh.

How do I know this? I don’t, but trust, hope, and the American way is my North Star.

Am I a good American? You tell me:

Boy Scout, sports champ, high school grad, Army vet, college grad, married with one wife and kids, still married with kids and grandkids, worked to make the state a better place.

Based on my sports record as a high school all-American, I like to think my boxes are checked to proclaim myself as a good citizen.

With that said, take my advice: When someone promises to pay you off for your support, be sure and look behind the curtains.

Money talks. Are you listening?

Trust. Hope. Then Exploit.

Be smarter than that.