REVENGE: HOW TO GET EVEN WITHOUT FEELING BAD ABOUT IT

Getting revenge for the wrong reason is no way to live.

Why?

Because getting even for the wrong reason sets up the next round.

The right reason brings the same result, but it doesn’t matter.

For people who see revenge as a way of life it’s business as usual either way.

Who are these people?

The obvious answer? They are bad role models.

Who remembers their first experience with role modeling? Did it come from a parent, a teacher, an older sibling? You saw them and said to yourself, “That’s who I want to be like when I grow up.”

Then you grew up and understood the delicate balance roll models must keep to maintain their image.You probably felt the pressure of role modeling. Pressure? There’s supposed to be pressure?

Revenge Pressure

The perfect high school student misses out on the top award, the valedictorian role, because they got a B in PE.

They want revenge after the teacher couldn’t understand how hard they worked in class.

Take on a PE teacher? Good luck with that.

They take on all comers, from football players who blame them for no scholarship offers, to academics who needed that A for the report card sweep.

Who wants to go after the college science professor who flunked students after he brought in non-english speaking guest lecturers no one could understand?

Or the boss who fired them after co-workers sabotaged their work?

Getting even creates a long list that gets longer with every year of festering indecision and fear and blame.

It’s that damn PE teacher that ruined things, but the professor wasn’t much better, and the boss was the worst of all.

They are the problem? Or is it, could it be, something else?

The Revenge Brain

Tell me if you know this person: They got married, blamed their partner for their problems, got divorced.

So far so good?

They didn’t marry the football star, didn’t marry the valedictorian, and got stuck with a partner who didn’t measure up to their fantasy life. But it’s the partner’s fault?

Happily ever after was never in the cards, but how can you know this ahead of time?

Time is the key.

Jump too soon, before you’re ready, and you might fall. But who prepares to fall when they know everything there is to know.

Jump too late and what happens? It’s hard to jump too late if you can’t jump at all.

Next up is blame. Blame for everyone and everything but you. Leave that to the people who know you best. They’ll blame everyone and everything for you.

But there is another path.

Living Well Is The Best Path

You’ve heard this. It’s not new. What is living well?

Is it collecting the iconic stuff seen on TV? The big house, new cars, and a cute white picket fence?

Is it expensive food from new restaurants, relaxing clothes after eating too much, and top shelf wine? A fancy couch, designer shelving, custom made footstools?

I’ll start with that couch. Show me a couch without a plastic cover, or in a museum, and I’ll show you a spill stain.

New restaurants? Do want to be a part of that experiment?

It all sounds like living well, but without the right foundation it means nothing.

Can you spend time with people you care about without an agenda, just to be around them?

Hold a baby without trying to entertain just to hold a baby?

Hug a friend?

Living well without the ‘showtime’ part is calming. Working to make the day better for those close to you is satisfying. Writing hopeful posts for an uncertain world? Very rewarding.

Living well glows differently. Do things today so you can wake up tomorrow with a positive self-assessment.

Were you trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent?

Yes? Good job.

No? Here’s a scout law review.