LIVING LARGE? WHAT’S THE SECRET

Living large usually means more than drawing a breath.

Most people compare themselves to others for reference.

Not me.

My large living is no secret:

It’s my wife and kids, and their wives and kids.

Shocking, I know.

But it’s simple. All you need to do is pay attention to those around you no matter who they are.

But why wife and kids? Why elevate them on the scale of who’s who?

Whenever I hear guys talking about their sixty-hour work week something is missing.

Back in the day, I’m calling on the 1950’s, the man in the gray flannel suit was The Man.

Tie that tie right and start climbing the corporate ladder to success, or?

In the end, Tom sees how his boss’s marriage and family life have been ruined by overwork, so he turns down a high-pressure position involving travel in order to work normal hours and spend more time at home.

Then came the 60’s and 70’s with a different take on work life.

Taking care of business got personal in 1973.

You get up every morning from your alarm clock’s warning
Take the 8:15 into the city
There’s a whistle up above and people pushin’, people shovin’
And the girls who try to look pretty
And if your train’s on time, you can get to work by nine
And start your slaving job to get your pay
If you ever get annoyed, look at me I’m self-employed
I love to work at nothing all day

And I’ll be taking care of business (every day)
Taking care of business (every way)
I’ve been taking care of business (it’s all mine)
Taking care of business and working overtime, work out

 

1973 was the year I graduated from high school.

Have I been working at nothing all day ever since?

No, and I don’t know anyone who has, but doesn’t it sound nice?

What’s the pay for working at nothing all day?

Nothin’ from nothin’ leaves nothin’
And I’m not stuffin’, believe you me
Don’t you remember I told ya
I’m a soldier in the war on poverty, yeah
Yes, I am

 

 

Living Large For One Reason

The difference between a personal promise and a public announcement?

You don’t get held accountable by everyone who has never made such a promise because you keep it secret.

Do it publicly, and by that I mean telling anyone and everyone you know your plan, and here come the questions.

‘How’s it going? Are you still doing it? You look different so it must be working?’

You lose the weight, dress nicer, get a haircut, and boom, you’re a new man, a new woman.

What do you hear after you declare your intentions wholeheartedly, then forget about it?

Nothing, because nothing changed.

One day you have a support group, a gathering of like-minded fans, and you start your big effort, your extra effort.

You see a clear path devoid of hurdles and side-issues and let it fly.

Run Forrest, run.

Then you slowly come back down to earth and find a different reality.

Your good intentions weren’t enough to create the momentum you needed to keep going.

Your plan was too drastic.

How many people see something and think, ‘I could do that,’ or, ‘I could build that,’ or, ‘That doesn’t look so hard to me.’

If you’ve never tried doing what you plan to do, there is definitely a different reality.

Keep your own failure in mind when you hear someone else explain plans that sound like yours did.

Show some enthusiasm. They don’t need to know how your plans turned out after you quit trying.

Don’t talk about the loneliness of the long distance runner, if that’s where you’re headed.

Don’t tell them about your feelings of isolation when you try and change your diet and can’t go to any restaurants.

Your life isn’t some made up Hollywood movie with a happy ending, but to me that’s the goal.

Happy is good.

Are we happy yet?

 

Trick Your Brain For Living Large

I see myself five times more attractive when I see my kids.

Their mom gets all the credit for being such handsome devils.

I’ve been called ‘pretty boy’ before, but they’ve taken that crown.

And smart? Thank your momma, boys.

She’s smart and crafty.

I don’t know how women navigate their world, but it’s not the same as men.

They may both get the same results, the same answers, but each takes a different route.

As parents we were on the same page. We respected their teachers and coaches, and reminded them there is a life to plan for so pay attention.

Now they are living that life, and doing it better than ever.

Now I’ve got beautiful kids, daughters-in-law, and grandkids so sweet it makes me tear up just thinking about how lucky I am.

You don’t get that when you check out, when you go solo, when you ignore people who care about each other.

 

No Hurdles, No Side Tracks? No Way

There is no such thing as a clear glide path, even when it looks clear.

Go to school, get a job, raise a family. Nothing to it.

Then there’s everything else going on at the same time to distract your focus.

The right school, the right job, the right partner?

If they’re not right, work to make them right.

Good health, warm home, loving people.

If you don’t check every box, sharpen your pencil, get answers, then check them.

There’s always the unexpected, the emergency, the recovery.

How you respond to them tells you who you are, and lets others know who you are.

After you’ve been tested by life and come out with not just a passing grade, but a passing grade where 90% of the population fails, you’ve made a mark.

You may not know what the mark means, may not see a white light, but the glow of wonder and amazement stays on forever.

Your family sees it, and anyone who knows the story sees it.

The work ahead is to make it matter in the best way possible by being the best husband and dad.

Then the question will be, “How do you do it?”

A writer knows; a blogger knows; a dad knows.