GYM LIFE vs REAL LIFE: OR JUST A FANTASY?

The best time to join gym life?

Any time is the right time, even now during coronavirus closure. Plan ahead to get a jump.

This isn’t an urgent notice, not like trying to make up for year of sloth by joining on New Year’s Day.

The steady gym rat types always complain about New Year’s Eve.

“Are you ready for the first month of the new year, and the crush of new people?” I heard.

They weren’t talking to me, so I didn’t answer. Someone else answered; someone always answers.

“Every year new people come and go. I don’t remember when the last one stuck around.”

This is the pertinent question of gym life vs real life: Who notices anyone else while they’re in a lifting groove?

What Gym Life Notices

The big man on the pull-up bar shifting his weight to the left, then the right, in the middle of a pull-up?

That’s not normal. It takes practice. In face, anyone who makes gains in the gym are at practice. They practice lifting.

The small man benching four plates?

Again, it takes practice, a lifetime of practice. When I see that when I walk in, I know I’ve seen the best thing I’ll see all day.

I saw a big guy bench about six hundred pounds, based on my quick math. Half an hour later I asked which part of Russia he came from.

“Actually, I’m German,” he said.

“That was my second guess.”

A strong young man who likes wearing a crop-top put his gear on the floor and set up a little lego-wall around it. His pack was his castle. He knew how to mark his territory.

The guy is clear to do anything he wants in the gym since he does the sort of killer workouts no one else can do.

Gym Life Impressions

One sound travels my gym now and then: The quick percussive pops of a fighter working he heavy bag.

Most of the time guys sort of paw at the big bag like they don’t want to really cut loose. Are they afraid of hurting it?

The noise was a crisp thump. The man doing the thumping used a stretch band to hold the back near him, which seemed sort of genius. Who ties themselves to a bag?

Most of the time a heavy hitter has someone hold the bag while they move through their routine. Not this time.

This guy hit so hard it stretched the band, then he moved laterally for the follow-up. Even though he was close to it, the power he displayed made room for destruction.

Every punch looked like a knock-out.

Big Hitters

I was in the sauna one day when a younger guy walked in. He looked like he wore a t-shirt with muscles printed on it, but it was all him.

When he started shadow boxing, I volunteered to raise my hands like Mickey did for Rocky. I took my place near a wall, raised my hands palms forward, the the fighter took his stance.

He bobbed and weaved, deked and duked, and popped my hand so hard I hit myself in the face and bounced my head off the wall.

I didn’t go down, or drop my hands, but the guy was sorry he hurt me. I wasn’t hurt, and waited. He decided we were done in the nicest way, instead of acting like I didn’t know how to train a fighter.

His dad was Rowdy Roddy Piper, and he knew how to train a fighter.

Main Gym Lessons

Start with consistency. Show up, warm up, and work.

Crusty guys in their large arm-hole tank tops with a T-back spend too much time ragging on women who clean up before a workout.

Are they wrong?

One of the most dedicated lifters is a five foot woman, a mom in her forties, who shows up color coordinated and done up with the works. Perfect hair, perfect make-up, and strong like no one’s business.

She’s all about the gym life, and it shows.

“You see that woman?” she said. “If she worked harder instead of talking all of the time she wouldn’t have a flat ass.”

If a guy said that, I’d tell them to shut up and lift. This lady spoke the sort of truth that is hard to argue with.

In closing, I know it’s a hard pull for gym rats when the gym is shut down. These are people who need something more from life than the usual serving of goodness.

These are times made for the habits of gym people. They always wash up, never touch their faces, and look for ways to help others. If you need a spotter, they are who to call over.

If gym rats didn’t have a gym, they’d find something else to feed their need to strain and stress their bodies. And they would inspire the heck out of anyone saw their routine.

Except, gym people are there for the results, their results, and they don’t want to carry anyone along. They may lift others up, but in true gym rat fashion, they don’t seem to care.

I wouldn’t call those in the gym life leaders, but who else would you want to follow?