GOOGLE ANALYTICS MAKE BETTER READERS

Google Analytics only goes so far.

See, numbers don’t lie when they come from the industry standard.

If numbers are too much, you also get a map.

Either way, when the numbers come in you’ve got to analyze them.

Boston must have an auto-dialer working overtime. They’ve come here for 136 sessions amounting to one second. Dear Boston, find another blog to bother, I’ve got enough to do.

Yesterdays readers arrived from thirty six U.S. states, twenty four countries, and one hundred and fifteen cities.

Sounds good until a closer look.

I’ve got one reader in China. What else do you need to know?

One. Reader. Billions. Of. People.

Is my one reader holding them all back from his station on the Great Chinese Firewall?

Well, let me just say this to that:

亲爱的中国，

请不要担心俄勒冈博客中毒的公民。我的演出，我的消息，教导别人如何使用我自己的挑战，我自己的成功与失败，以应付。是的，我自认是忏悔。如发表在BoomerPdx你的国家是坏主意安全你可以相信我的话。

此致，大卫·

(Dear China,

Please don’t worry about an Oregon blogger poisoning your citizens. My gig, my message, teaches others how to cope by using my own challenges, my own failure and success. Yes, I confess to being confessional. You can take my word as published in BoomerPdx that your nation is safe from bad ideas.

Sincerely, David)

Google Analytics says India has twice as many readers as China.

Equal to Russia and China combined, India leads the world to BoomerPdx.

Two readers from India and I’m not complaining.

Could be I’m not speaking their language?

I’ll fix that right now:

प्रिय भारत,

अपने महान देश के अंदर एक ओरेगन ब्लॉगर की अनुमति के लिए धन्यवाद। मैं अपने नागरिकों, मेरे अपने चुनौतियों, मेरे अपने की विफलता और सफलता का उपयोग कैसे अपने स्वयं के साथ सामना करने के लिए एक उदाहरण के रूप में प्रोत्साहित करते हैं। मुझे अपने पाठकों के लिए उम्मीद है कि वे अपने माता-पिता, अपने शहर और अपने राष्ट्र का सम्मान है। के रूप में BoomerPdx में प्रकाशित है कि मेरे इरादों एक शांतिपूर्ण दिन के साथ सद्भाव में हैं तुम मेरे शब्द है।

निष्ठा से, डेविड

(Dear India,

Thank you for allowing an Oregon blogger inside your great country. I encourage your citizens to use my own challenges, my own failure and success, as an example of how to cope with their own. What I hope for in my readers is that they respect their parents, their city, and their nation. You have my word as published in BoomerPdx that my intentions are in harmony with a peaceful day.

Sincerely, David)

Google Analytics on Russia.

Another wrong to be righted:

I’ve got more Russian readers in Woodburn and Beaverton than Russia proper.

Because of a big red firewall? Bad tech? Or fear?

This needs addressed right now:

Дорогой мой русский читатель в России,

Каждый пост я положил на BoomerPdx отражает величайших литературных традиций. На основе многолетних исследований и практики, написание пересылаемые отсюда все ваши INSIGHT ищущих друзей сделает их лучше информированы, психически гибок, и о так сексуально. Женщины видят читатели мужского BoomerPdx как более желательным. Мужчины видят читательница BoomerPdx в качестве потенциальных партнеров жизни они могут взять домой, чтобы встретить свои родитель. Ни разочаруют. Это не поддельные новости.

С уважением, Дэвид

(My Dear Russian Reader inside Russia,

Every post I put up on BoomerPdx reflects the greatest of literary traditions. Based on years of research and practice, the writing you forward from here to all of your insight-seeking friends will make them better informed, mentally flexible, and oh so sexy. Women see male BoomerPdx readers as more desirable. Men see female BoomerPdx readers as potential life partners they can take home to meet their parents. Neither will disappoint. This is not fake news.

Sincerely, David)

Here’s to all having the best day of the week.

Cheers.

乾杯。

चीयर्स।

Приветствия.