AMAZON PRIME DELIVERING MORE THAN ORDERED?

Amazon Prime ruled the road during a recent outing.

It wasn’t every car, but enough to make me wonder:

‘Are these electric vans? Why aren’t they electric vans?’

I must have wondered aloud because my wife said, “This is a lot of vans. What’s going on. You should blog this.”

So . . .

When then-CEO Jeff Bezos announced a deal with the EV startup in 2019 to buy 100,000 vans, he said they should be on the road by 2024. Now, Amazon projects to hit 100,000 vans on the road by 2030, but they should be on the road soon in cities including Baltimore, Chicago, Dallas, Kansas City, Nashville, Phoenix, San Diego, Seattle, and St. Louis — and reach 100 cities by the end of this year.

But, it’s 2022 and all I see are the usual delivery vans.

Why is that?

Can I be the only non-billionaire who sees a lane of amazon prime trucks and think, ‘Couldn’t this be better?’

Then I saw the forecast of electric vans on the road by 2030, or 2040, or 2050.

Am I the only hybrid driving idiot who sees the line up of vans on the road and thinks, ‘How about now, Jeff?’

If I crawled out from under a rock yesterday it would take me mere moments to find auto makers putting electric vehicles on the road.

I could cruise this blog and find the first car ever built in Portland.

Added Together, It’s Not Rocket Science

If the choice for a huge company like Amazon runs between gas van and electric van, what is the problem?

If I’ve heard of Tesla, then you’ve heard of Tesla. We’ve all heard of Tesla.

Has Jeff Bezos heard of Tesla? I’ll venture a guess of, “Yes, Jeff Bezos is aware of Tesla.”

Imagine if Bezos and Tesla man Elon Musk were buddies and interested in joining together and solve problems like too many Amazon gas vans on the road?

“Hey buddy, I need electric vans to replace my fleet. I’m seeing too many gas powered vans on the road, and I’m not on the road that much. What do you think?”

“I’d like to help, buddy, but I’m too busy buying twitter, or not buying twitter, and banging out kids to expand my brood. But we could get high sometime. I know a guy.”

“Thanks, E, but everyone knows a guy. It’s the guy in the weed store.”

“Whatever, Jeff. But not everyone knows Mr. Electric Car, and with your attitude you won’t either.”

“We’re working toward the same goals. If we consider the earth our home, we don’t want it stunk up. We can do that together by combining work life and home.”

“You do a lot of home stuff. Me, not so much.”

“It’s your home, too.”

“For now. Have you seen my rocket?”

“Your rocket? Have you seen my rocket?”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Amazon Prime Time To Speak Up

IT’S NOT THAT COMPLICATED, YOU KNOW?

THEY ALWAYS MAKE IT SO COMPLICATED.

IF IT WAS ME, ME, RIGHT HERE, THIS ME, I’D GET TOYOTA VANS AND TRUCKS, ELECTRIC VANS AND TRUCKS.

TESLA ISN’T THE BOSS OF ELECTRIC VEHICLES. THAT GUY.

BUT NO, AMAZON FUNDS A START UP. A START UP. IF YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT AND YOU WANT IT NOW, WHAT’S A START UP GOING TO DO?

IMPORTANT RICH WHITE MEN ALWAYS NEED A PLAN, A PROCESS, ANYTHING TO SHOW THEY’RE SMART TOO.

LIKE BILL GATES AND HIS WIFE. YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT? HE DOESN’T HAVE A WIFE ANYMORE.

NEITHER DOES JEFF BEZOS AND IF HE DOES IT’S NOT HIS FIRST WIFE.

WHAT’S WRONG WITH STAYING TOGETHER? SURE, GO OUT AND SPEND MONEY ON YOUR SWEET YOUNG THINGS, BUT KEEP YOUR HOME STRAIGHTENED UP.

NO ONE WANTS A BITTER WIFE IN THE REARVIEW MIRROR, RIGHT? CAN YOU HEAR ME?

The Modern World Of Tomorrow Starts Today

“Today represents an important step, not just for Amazon and Rivian as partners, but also for transportation and the environment,” said RJ Scaringe, CEO of Rivian. “In 2019, Rivian and Amazon committed to fast-tracking a new type of delivery vehicle that would result in a significant reduction of carbon emissions. Thanks to our teams’ dedication, hard work and collaboration, and a shared commitment to make the world a better place for our kids’ kids, that vision is now being realized. To say this is an exciting moment is an understatement—we’re thrilled to see this partnership has kickstarted decarbonization projects across the logistics delivery industry.”

Now our kids’ kids won’t live in a world of hacking and oxygen masks?

If that’s the plan, why not kick it in harder. My kids’ kids are already here.

Shockingly enough, I’m not the only grandparent thinking about the future.

The future is a two year old discovering the joy of climbing on everything worth climbing.

We like climbers. Maybe you’re a climber, too?

The future is a wedding tomorrow joining two climbers who found each other and decided a life together is better than a life alone. Or with somebody else.

Young people will brave the new world of married responsibilities, but they’ll need a soundtrack.

Why Meat Loaf?

I never had a girl
Looking any better than you did
And all the kids at school
They were wishing they were me that night

The beauty of the song is its universal appeal to a certain time and place.

When it’s this time and this place, we’re like all the kids at school wishing the big timers would do more to improve our external environment.

We’ll take care of our internal environment the best we can.

If that sounds like a baby boomer promise, consider the source.

BoomerPDX makes promises that need help.

Can I count on Amazon Prime to deliver their promises?