STAY CALM ENOUGH TO MAKE IT THROUGH HARD TIMES

Stay calm is different than being told, “CALM DOWN.”

The first is what you tell yourself; the second is what you hear when it’s not working.

What’s the big deal about staying calm?

Is it really that important? Yes, and here’s why:

If you’re even thinking about needing to stay calm, you are, by definition, in an agitated state.

Most likely you’re not alone, and if you are, your calmness will still affect others eventually.

If you’re not used to being a role model, and people are looking to you for guidance, stay calm.

When you’re new to leadership and sitting in the big chair, staying calm might keep you there.

The problems get worse when you lead yourself, feel like nothing matters, and you set priorities from that position.

A sharp downturn in money, health, and relationships puts things on edge.

How can anyone stay calm when it seems like you’re losing everything?

Start by taking an inventory. If you’re reading this in Ukraine while running from Russians and carrying your life belongings in a pack, don’t stop.

But, if you’re a well nourished citizen who feels shamed for being asked to wear a mask in a cancer ward waiting room, keep calm Karen.

A Calm Marriage Is The Goal

I was working up a comparison to ‘Happy Wife, Happy Life‘ for the married men and came up empty.

Nothing compares, and if you think ‘Animal Husbandry’ works, you’re wrong and you ought to keep it yourself.

Do you think your wife wants to hear animal husbandry associated with them? All the care and feeding of competition animals in 4-H applied to a spouse might send the wrong message.

While it’s all about leadership and role modeling with “Head, Heart, Hands, Health” it’s not a good Valentine card inspiration.

Husbandry alone, without the animal part, takes many paths.

Wife has a flat tire, but a lunch date with her friend, and it was early afternoon, too early to not go and get it fixed?

So fix it.

Wife asks for help curling her hair to look her best?

Plug in that curling iron, brother.

Wife thinks you’d look good in a Scottish Kilt?

You’re on your own for that one. There’s always something to challenge calm.

Communicate, Compromise, And Keep Calm

No one should go through hard times all alone, but we still do.

When it’s you, and you read how no one is alone, but you are utterly alone, make a few changes.

Start with a personal inventory, but don’t count the people who love you because you’ll never know. Instead, count the people you love.

Chances are good they don’t know how you feel, and that’s fine as long as you’re feeling it.

If you’re a Zoomer or Millennial, you’ll have a shorter list than a Baby Boomer or better.

Either way, start with parents first, then move on to teachers and coaches and professors and friends and family.

The trick is working out indecision. If you can’t decide if you have feelings for one person, give yourself the benefit of the doubt. You can hide your love away from them, but not yourself.

Think of it as an exercise in keeping a calm state. That leads to better things.

You might feel a thousand miles from nowhere, but if you stay calm and keep moving, you’re closing the distance between you and those you care about.

I’ve got bruises on my memory
I’ve got tear stains on my hands
And in the mirror there’s a vision
Of what used to be a man

Go ahead and give yourself the benefit of the doubt.