TREAT TRAINING FOR WORLD PEACE JEANS

Treat training for a teething puppy is better than a bloody hand every time you pet it.

Ask me how I know.

Could it work for rogue nations intent on attacking neighbors like said puppy attacks everything as if their existence depends on it?

Try explaining how this works to the dog before you call Putin.

It goes like this:

Puppy has little teeth that are needle sharp. While they may not intend on taking you down and eating your guts, puppies like to put their mouth on things.

One of those things is a hand, and sometimes those sharp teeth find some grip. Then when you pull away they cut like a knife.

It’s nothing personal, just what puppies do. Then they grow up. Treat training helps them get over the hump.

The same concept applies when trying to understand the Russian invasion of Ukraine. Russia is not a new un-housebroken puppy mistaking Ukraine for a blue pee-pad.

Let’s Talk About Treats, Not Tricks

The top image is a pair of jeans and treat training at the same time.

Those aren’t your dad’s 501 Levi’s. They are next level.

Are they 5X better than other jeans? Maybe.

Think of Russia as a fat man, but skinny-fat.

Do you know skinny-fat? That’s where a thin person puts on excess weight too fast and it isn’t evenly distributed. Too much booze can do it. If you doubt me, go to the nearest bar for a triple vodka and find out.

So there’s Russia with the modern world in a pair of modern jeans at its doorstep and their interpretation of modern in the house.

For proof, they have space technology, rockets, missiles, jets, and nuclear power plants. And the big bangers.

Are you convinced of modern Russia? Good. And like modern America, not everyone goes along with the program.

What they all need is treat training, but what kind of a treat works here?

The All-American Trick

What do you offer the Reverend Jim Bob who preaches his gospel to a spellbound congregation on Sundays after a solid week of Fox News research to back him up?

“Ah feel this way because my daddy, bless his poor soul, my granddaddy, and every man who’s been man enough to hang on my family tree feels the same way. We felt this way in 1860 all the way to 2022. Now, we all know the 2020 election was rigged, but the left-wing media elite fake news won’t call it what it is, brothers and sisters, and we know what it is: A Big Lie, as God is my witness, a damnable Big Lie. Huge. The Biggest. Put a little something extra in the plate today and I’ll pass it along to President Trump.

“And what else do we know and pray for? Let’s pray now for the wrongful persecution against the Capitol insurgents among us, and those in custody. We all know they acted in line with normal political discourse while on a regular Capitol tour. And, my dear friends, it is a beautiful Capitol worth saving for Donald Trump. With something extra in the tray, let us bow our heads and pray.”

Russian Treat Training

From reddit:

I’m tired. I prove every day to my acquaintances and relatives what is really going on. I have also done a number of other things to get information to people, but i won’t write about them here.

These people don’t understand, they all say “So what? There is a substitute for all this”. Today i tried to prove to my mother that cosmetics are leaving the market, as well as laundry products and other things. In response, she told me “Well, we don’t need it, we’ll find a replacement”.

I don’t know, really, what needs to be taken away from russians just to make them understand what’s going on. Okay, you don’t go out to rallies, because that means putting a lot at stake. But! You don’t even want to understand what’s going on, to admit that there’s a war there, that people are dying there, and that it’s our country’s fault. To acknowledge and understand, to think – you can’t go to jail for that. It seems to me that even if they start to send in the funeral bulletins, they will still support Putin.

I’m getting desperate, and i’m thinking about taking all my savings, my things, my cat, and leaving this country.

Forgive my emotional weakness. I hope that tomorrow i will wake up with new strength.

Modern Treat Training Jeans

Fashion, like national identity, can be manipulated.

With jeans boasting 5X’s the stretch, you could carry a 42″ waist and get into a 36″ waist.

Or, maybe you’re a 36″ waist and try on a 30″. Very slim, very sleek.

It’s a fashion trick I like, following along the lines of an expensive gown where the designer can sew any size label in.

“Size 3?”

“Damn right. Pass the gravy, please.”

2

Russia has a seat at the nuclear power table, the great nation table, the super power table, so why revert to Stalingrad siege tactics of guaranteed human suffering on a huge scale?

Dear Russia, you defeated Napoleon and the Nazis. You held Eastern Europe behind an iron curtain after WWII, now your ruler is pulling the curtain on you.

What will it mean?

The jeans will fit Putin, he doesn’t need Ukraine to fill out the front. It’s a relaxed fit, not an invade-the-neighbors fit.