THE PORTLAND RIVIERA ON NORTH MISSISSIPPI

via boomerpdx and J-J-H Productions

Is there such a thing as the Portland Riviera?

When you hear the words French Riviera what comes to mind?

Movie stars? Warm, sandy, beaches? France?

How about the Spanish Riviera?

It’s in the same neighborhood, same water, as the French Riviera, but not as famous.

These two Rivieras don’t have signs designated at ‘clothing optional’ or ‘topless.’ Why? Because it’s Europe.

Over there you might hit the beach with a crowd of nearly nude people and find yourself sitting next to them in a restaurant a few hours later, fully clothed.

Either way, it’s a good thing if you maintain your composure. No staring and pointing.

Then there’s the Portland Riviera.

Recently a couple visited Portland and referred to the Portland Riviera.

We were dragging the gut on North Mississippi around midnight. It was busy.

If that’s on your list of places to go, you’ll see Portland in a dark light. It happens around midnight.

Long narrow bars packed full of lively people in dark clothes, and more.

If you make it through the front of a few places you end up outside, which is even better.

Outside means semi-covered fire pits.

That’s where you’ll notice everyone looks better than they do in bright light. Ah, firelight, the great fixer. That and a few beers set North Mississippi apart.

But there’s no Portland Riviera.

People working their buzz at night doesn’t quite translate to fun in the sun. Especially in January.

If the topic comes up, as in Portland Riviera, be sure no one is talking about a beach on the Willamette River.

The only fun in the sun I’ve seen there is a tent under the Morrison Bridge. And it didn’t look like a vacation rental. Not an Airbnb.

The Portland Riviera happens on Sauvie Island’s beaches, some of which are clothing optional.

Unlike the French and Spanish Rivieras where topless is the norm, the Portland Riviera goes all the way.

For better or worse.

If an all-over tan is your goal, and spray on orange isn’t your color, you’ve got to drop the swimsuit.

Another version of the Portland Riviera comes on wheels as the Nude Bike Ride. Not much sun, but it is also clothing optional.

The last Riviera on the list is the Redneck Riviera. Google it.

By the end of the night the Portland Riviera was the winner on North Mississippi.

You’d expect as much from looking at the car pic on top.

Riviera-style. Wait for warmer temps.