SEWER SYSTEMS WORTH EVERY SCENT? THINK ABOUT IT

Sewer systems have been around since the first caveman said, “Not in the fire, over there.”

Things have improved since then, but in small steps.

Once civilized man moved indoors, things got better?

Not right away.

I’ve spent time tramping around castles and churches in Europe and came away amazed at the size of the structures.

How were they built without cranes?

Very carefully.

It was all good until a few months ago I read an account explaining why some English Kings moved from castle to castle.

I can’t find the source but it went something like this:

The king and his court moved from one castle to the next when the smell and sight of sewage became too great to navigate.

That makes sense?

Then they’d come back around on the castle tour to clean floors.

What got me most in the castles was bathroom placement.

If the king or a noble had a sudden urge to go and had to find a bathroom?

Then what?

Follow The Sewer Systems Leader

If the king lived in stink and filth, what about the non-royals?

It had to be even worse, I’d think.

In Versailles I went up and down stairways, passed through elaborate royal rooms, and came away highly impressed.

Until:

One king that always gets accused of being dirty (in more ways than one) is Louis XIV.  Numerous books contain the rumor that Louis XIV bathed “only three or two times in his life”.

The ruling theory of the time was that simply changing your linen would soak up sweat and dirt. The rich wore tightly woven fabrics like linen and taffeta because it was believed to keep the crawlies away from skin. 

Loose garments were believed to be far less effective in staying clean. 

The king’s morning ritual consisted of his hands and face being wiped down with spirits and then his sweat-drenched linen was changed (Louis reportedly sweat a lot).

His courtiers then sent him on his way to go to mass, his council meeting, hunt, chase the ladies and work up some more sweat. His linen was then changed a couple of more times throughout the course of the day.  But no bathing!

Clean Castle? Eventually

I went from walking in the footsteps of giants, to walking in a former cesspool?

The royal clothing looked to be a difficult puzzle to solve in the bathroom.

What did the ladies in long gowns and layers of petticoats do?

Let ‘er rip.

Since I learned bathroom habits of the past rich and famous I’ve taken a second look at shoes worn by royal ladies.

Any suspicious stains?

What about the men?

Peter the Czar of Russia
This man was supposed to be widely travelled, educated and cultured .. but probably in his own way.  Good and proper hygiene was a practice he never understood nor followed.  He found nothing wrong with urinating on the glittering palace walls. He washed occasionally using natural mineral spring bath.  Regular bathing never became his habit.

It’s Good To Be King, Or Czar

One exposure will make you glad we have good sewer systems

If one exposure doesn’t do it, you might come from royalty.

And that exposure could be on the third day of a three day rock concert with campsite sanicans.

The party people spray them down with vomit and diarrhea by the third day.

“Which of toilets is cleanest?”

“The second from the left.”

“Thanks.”

They leave. Another camper asks:

“Why did you say second from the left. I opened that door. It was a disaster.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Dog parks with sanicans are also a celebration of good sewer systems.

After all, we’re not wild animals dropping a deuce in public like our dogs.

They have little poo-bags for that.

Try not to complain if a random outhouse isn’t up to your standards.

Not everyone is up for the roadside rest stop where you pull over on the side, open front and back doors to block passing traffic, and do your bidness.

If you didn’t know, now you do.