MONUMENT ROAD? HOLD TIGHT

Monument Road, or the road around Monument Valley, isn’t the worst road I’ve been on.

But it is the longest bad road.

How bad?

Was it the bad road, or the bad driver?

I was driving; then I wasn’t.

From the start:

Monument Valley is not a federally funded national park.

That National Park pass you bought for ten dollars? Doesn’t work.

That National park road you’re used to? Not here.

The first question I had on the way down to the valley floor was one of ‘pothole or sink hole.’

The road down had drive-around elements.

Either drive around or bottom out and get your muffler ripped loose.

How do I know? This is the sort of landscape that encourages loud V8 engines to wind up through the gears in the middle of the night.

It’s a throwback sound of amateur stock car racers.

Hit The Road And The Road Hits Back

Besides the big gaps in the dirt road, there was washboard, the chattering cover you need to find the right speed on to avoid getting shook hard.

I had the wheel, wife in the passenger seat, dog in back.

Eventually my wife decided she could drive better than me.

She said she could, then she proved it.

“Take over, honey,” I said.

And she did.

Then I was in the passenger seat flopping around.

The steering wheel was a good anchor. Not anymore. At least not for me.

Since this isn’t the Baja 500 we didn’t need to go fast.

Just fast enough to dull the tooth rattling road.

Was it a good decision driving the loop around Monument Valley?

Yes.

Was it a good decision changing drivers?

Would the Duke have given up the wheel?

Well, pilgrim, if you have to ask . . .