MAN JUNK FOR THE HE-MAN

Man junk is a taboo topic to bring up. Especially broken junk.

Vasectomy? Same thing. It cuts a little too close to home.

HPV neck cancer? Hush your mouth. Or not.

Yesterday I wrote about vasectomy, which some men consider less than manly.

Today, let’s take it a little further.

My first Portland job was in the old VA hospital based on my Army medic experience.

Nothing I learned in the Army had anything to do with ward work, but I applied myself with enthusiasm.

I made beds like it was a contest between the sheets and I.

One day a man in his forties came in.

Healthy looking, well nourished.

He was in a shared room bed while I whipped out the sheets and changed the other bed like a bed changing demon. I was a professional, dammit.

While I’m going at it the guy in the bed got started.

“Hell of a thing to see, a grown man doing women’s work.”

He said it pretty loud, like a deaf person talking without their hearing aid.

“Yes, sir. It’s the sort of work that needs doing. Today it’s me.”

“Hard to imagine why a man would choose this line of work.”

“It’s a job worth doing and I’m a former Army medic.”

“If I couldn’t find work more suited to men I don’t know what I’d do.”

“You’ll be fine, sir.”

“I’m not so sure about you.”

He’s been an Army mail clerk, now a mailman. A big hardcore oorah for him.

Just A Mistaken Man

I passed by the room later in the day.

The guy was back from surgery with a big mound of something under the blankets in the crotch area.

He was asleep when the nurse came in. I asked what he’d had done.

It was an erectile dysfunction surgery, the kind with a pump. He got a man junk tune-up.

When he woke up I did my work. It was the sort of work I’d do decades later as a home caregiver for my Parkinson’s afflicted father in law who had a similar attitude.

Who knew?

“Can I get you some fresh water? You need to stay hydrated after surgery.”

Along with:

“How’s the pillow feel? A fresh one won’t be so warm.”

Topped off with:

“Let me know if you need anything. That’s my job, so let me know.”

While he was out in a wheelchair I changed his bed.

Later I saw him walking the ward with his wife who couldn’t stop looking at his pecker bandages and smiling.

Before he was discharged he had a few more things to say that wore my professional veneer even thinner.

The guy had more problems than a nut pump could cure.

Man Junk Decline Brings Anger

So the guy had problems and I was the only one around. That’s why I heard his bullshit.

The silent treatment isn’t the only thing you’ll experience if you and your partner have been arguing. Troubles in your emotional relationship can affect your sexual relationship. 

Arguments, poor communication, and anger can affect your sexual desire and sexual function. Working through these problems with your partner can help ease your symptoms of ED. 

If you have trouble resolving relationship issues on your own, seek out a counselor or therapist who can help.

I’m the pansy and he’s the he-man? In his eyes, yes.

As a professional ward assistant, nurses-aide, whatever the job was called, I saw it as honorable duty in the VA.

I got another job not long afterwards.

But not because of that guy.

Erectile dysfunction (ED) is the inability to get or keep an erection firm enough for sexual function. It’s a common sexual problem, affecting as many as 30 million men in the United States.

He was just another of the 30,000,000 in Dead Wood City.

I think of that guy when I see the faces of the men deciding what women can and can’t do with their own bodies.

This Is Not A Doctor:

Neither is this:

Who they are is two men at opposite ends of the age spectrum in the senate who want to decide medical issues for women.

What else do they have in mind? If they legislate according to the wishes of the voters who put them in office, that’s one thing, but if their votes are based on an agenda handed to them once they got there?

Shocking? I know. That’s why it’s called a voting block. Besides, voting block sounds better than delusional insurrectionists, cowardly Christians, or taking a knee to trump over the duties outlined in their oath of office.

I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter: So help me God.

It’s ‘mental reservation’ part that stands out.

That’s the part voters who don’t usually vote need to focus on. Especially women. Do you want these people, and others like them, in your doctor’s office?

What kind of mentality thinks that’s where they belong?

Animals that can’t control their reproductive choices are called livestock.

Explain that to your daughter; talk about it to your wife and mother in law.

Ask your Momma if she’s livestock and if your Dad ‘owns’ her?

After you come back to your man junk senses, leave a comment on how it went.