MAKING PLANS, NOWHERE PLANS FOR NOBODY

Making plans in December has been an American tradition unlike any other. Everyone shows up year after year, just like last year, just like next year.

Making plans in normal times was easy until a status change shifts everything forever.

After that no one makes plans thinking they’ll stick.

If you’re like me, and you probably are but can’t admit it because we’re all rugged and individual, you make plans with others in mind.

They are your husbands, wives, life partners, children. You know, the basics. If you find yourself among this grouping, does it mean you’re basic, too?

Look, it’s okay to be a little more basic when the need arrises, you ground breaker you, like when you’re making plans with someone with an agenda they’ve talked about, make a list for, and need you to agree with to enhance their self-esteem.

It’s called putting the other person first, and it’s not permanent. It won’t force you further into the shadows of old age, make you fade away, or steal your life spirit. It’s called getting along with others.

We learned the basics in grade school: Be friends with the class bully, unless you are the bully, then be a benevolent bully. Sit next to the smart girls if grades are important, and grades are always important. Don’t pull a track pistol on sixth grade girls during recess.

Making Plans From The Beginning

If you feel like doing nothing in December after doing nothing in November, October, or September, you’re going to get a Red Flag.

Someone who ‘thinks’ they know you will eventually question your mental health, unless you’re a hermit reading this. (And if you are a hermit, or harbor hermitic feelings, leave a comment. If you don’t, then you’re not getting along. Again. lol.)

And also, brokenhearted Nowhere Man, save your breath on the, “But, Dave, you don’t know what it’s like to love someone, yes love someone, the way I loved them.” No BeeGees in a Beatles’ reference.

Making plans from the beginning starts with a goal. One goal. Math is the first hurdle in plans. Set. One. Goal. The planning part are the steps toward that One. Goal.

The First Step doesn’t accomplish the One Goal, but it is the First Step you agree on. Ride that momentum, cowboy.

Hit the next link for an example of momentum.

Every step after the first closes in on the goal.

Take dinner plans, for example

You: Beans and hotdogs?

Partner: Arugula, romaine, kale, tomatoes, peppers, pumpkin seeds, shredded broccoli, thin-sliced bbq chicken thighs.

Find the middle ground here, buddy. Save the beans and dogs idea for another holiday, work with Partner.

This is what ‘work with Partner talk’ sounds like:

“I love your dinner idea. I’ll wash and chop the veggies after I clean the kitchen, take out the garbage, and do laundry.”

“I’ll get the salad bowl.”

Which one are you? Which one do you want to be?

I asked Nowhere Man.

He’s as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere man, can you see me at all
Nowhere man don’t worry
Take your time, don’t hurry
Leave it all ’til somebody else
Lends you a hand

For the shiftless loners out there, help out with thoughtful suggestions with someone who loves making plans. Explore the possibilities before making any choices.

Insider Tip: Every step toward accomplishing One Goal is a celebration worthy moment. First step party menu: beans and dogs.

Why? It motivates everyone to the next step. And go.