LATE BLOOMERS CROWD THE STAGE

Who loves late bloomers?

Not the people they crowd out.

It’s hard enough getting any traction and gains without someone new showing up and taking all of the attention.

To make it even worse, they might be Baby Boomers.

The whole notion of late bloomers remind me of a Picasso story a Rick Steves guide told while we were marching around the Montmartre neighborhood of Paris.

The other painters didn’t let Picasso into their studios because he could do what they were doing, do it better, and faster.

Given his lifespan, he had artists worried for a long time.

For me, the solution to late bloomers is to not feel threatened by them.

They do their work, you do yours, I’ll do mine.

At the same time do we need to celebrate every release from these geezers?

As a sixty-seven year old, and counting, I know geezers.

And, as a long-time blogger with BoomerPdx, and DeegeesBB, I know overnight success.

Red Broom

I celebrated a red broom on twitter. I inherited it from my stepdad and got thousands of hits.

Meaning what? People like to sweep?

Ugh the broomgeoisie inheriting intergenerational brooms and then looking down on the rest of us for our shitty dollar store brooms

This is so sad—they really don’t make brooms like they used to and you get to have one that works because we don’t tax inheritance enough.

Exactly. some of us can’t have a red push broom, watch ur privilege

My response:

If you read blogs for new ideas, here’s one: start changing the world by your example.

Instead of the ‘you don’t understand’ part, grab a broom, the RIGHT broom, a push broom, and push. 

You’ll know the broom when you feel it.

The hand me down push broom with the thread stripped plastic top? Not that one.

The one with the duct taped broom handle / paint stick as thin as a fishing pole? No.

The one I inherited from my step-dad’s garage? 

Yes.

David?

I wrote a post explaining the physiological reasons for the size of the statue of David’s package.

He was under stress fighting a giant. There’s shrinkage. I used a Seinfeld episode for medical reference, as one does.

One of the most intriguing, if least openly discussed, mysteries in art has been resolved.

Michelangelo’s David is meant to be a representation in marble of the perfect male form. So why did his creator not make him – how would one say – a little better endowed?

Speaking for all Davids on earth, stop staring at the junk.

It’s a sculpture in marble. That ought to be enough. Stone. Rock. The guy has better gear than any other named statue.

Is there a statue of Joe? Frank? Jimmy?

There’s a statue of Rocky in Philadelphia wearing shorts and no one questions the Italian Stallion.

David, the real Italian Stallion, gets all the grief.

Reddit found the post and flooded my blog with hit after hit. It was exciting . . .

But?

Late Bloomers Have Heard It All Before

My favorite Search Engine Optimization advice:

Write for free on other blogs for the exposure.

And:

Publish in local newspapers to attract readers to your blog.

Finally:

Make $10K a month by monetizing your blog.

It’s all good advice, not saying it’s bad. But it’s not the sort of advice I’d give a blogger starting out.

Why? Because, following one thing after another takes away from the goal:

Be a better writer. Tell a better story.

The spikes in my blog traffic brought a couple of extra emails, very nice emails, congratulatory emails.

They complimented my blog design, my writer’s voice, and said I was one of the best blogs they’d ever seen.

Then they offered to sell me a badge saying as much that I could copy and paste on my header.

Did you know you could pay for self-hype?

After that I saw other blogs brandishing their awards in a different light.

As a high school all-American with a gold medal in Greco-Roman wrestling, I’m not a fan of buying a share of acclaim.

Instead, I’ll work for it, keep working for it, and before too long I’ll join the late bloomers, too.

It’s only been ten years of blogging here with 3000+ posts.

By my calculations I’m on the verge of being an overnight sensation.

So. Close.

Who’s Who? Don’t Be Fooled

Online fame and fortune is different than paying for notoriety.

This is a link reporting a scam for being included in Who’s Who In America.

In 2023, we will be coming upon our 125th year anniversary, so one can imagine how many companies we have seen come and go claiming to be Marquis Who’s Who. We have been working tirelessly to differentiate ourselves from imposters and imitators for years. This is an issue that we take extraordinary seriously and we have been working with Federal Authorities providing them with hundreds of complaints and affidavits from Marquis Listees who have purported to be duped by copycats.

As you may be aware, there is no cost to be included, as listees are researched and vetted, so they cannot purchase their way into Marquis. This means we do NOT cold call. Candidates must complete an application before they are considered for inclusion in Marquis. 

These other companies do not maintain the same qualifications and verification process. Unfortunately, in most cases they simply dupe the customer out of money without delivering any product or value.

We encourage our Listees to look at their credit card statements, if their statement doesn’t say “Marquis Who’s Who” or “Who’s Who in America” this is NOT us. 

My Grandma was a distinguished lady who was in a Who’s Who. She liked showing us her book.

We liked seeing it, but we already knew she was special.

The Best Accolades For Late Bloomer Bloggers? A Spam Account

“You love me, you really love me.”

Good spam is full of love, the kind money can’t buy, like a listing in Who’s Who :

Fantastic blog! Do you have any tips and hints for aspiring writers? I’m planning to start my own website soon but I’m a little lost on everything. Would you propose starting with a free platform like WordPress or go for a paid option? There are so many choices out there that I’m totally overwhelmed .. Any tips? Appreciate it!

From me:

If you’re a writer, write. A blog is either a marketing tool added to a product website, or an introspective view of a naval shared with other naval gazers.

Or,

A blog can be a lens to see beyond your own experience without going through the indignities of gaining said experience.

Either way, stick with the fundamentals of story telling in three acts:

1. How things are. 2. How things get screwed up 3. How things are after fixing the screw up.

More clearly:

1. What it is. 2. What ruined it. 3. What it will be.

Or my favorite, the history question: What happened?

Magnificent post, very informative. I wonder why the other experts of this sector do not notice this. You must continue your writing. I am confident, you’ve a great readers’ base already!

I’m expecting a call from other experts any moment.

2

May I just say what a comfort to discover a person that truly understands what they are talking about on the internet. You certainly know how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More people really need to read this and understand this side of your story. I can’t believe you are not more popular since you certainly possess the gift.

The gift is practice. Then more practice.

If you practice, you get better. If you get better, you get noticed.

If you get noticed, then you’ll get a call from Smokehouse Pictures to sign an exclusive contract to do a podcast of your blog, leading to a movie starring George Clooney, Brad Pitt, and Ben Affleck.

Then, when they ask if you’ve got any other work to show, what do you do?

Keep Practicing.

That’s the late bloomers’ motto. Make it your’s, too.