FOOTBALL SOCIAL DISTANCING THEME SONG BY STING

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me
Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me

From too many sources to ignore, the coronavirus rule of thumb is keep your distance from everyone. (With thanks to Jane-Ann for a Facebook update on Medium.)

And like so many things we try to understand, sports offers a convenient analogy: Social distancing with a social stiff arm.

Here’s how it works:

If a friend is hacking and snorting and blowing their nose in their hand, add an extra foot to the six-foot spray border.

If an acquaintance comments on the ‘boohoo flu’ or the ‘woohoo flu’ they aren’t as concerned as a baby boomer over sixty and probably don’t have the same level of hygiene awareness. Give them the stiff arm, and wash up afterwards.

Social Distancing Manners

Follow the protocol of good sense. If you don’t know a nurse, find one, and ask what they’re doing. (Hey Kelly)

I’ve asked my gym rat pals what they’re doing different. The people present aren’t doing much, but they’ve got more room to do it because the worried group is staying home.

I’m looking for the old ER Doc for his opinion, but he’s been gone a while. Another old guy who checked out for a year to get some cancer work is back. I’ll mention social distancing to him next time I see him.

Gyms on normal days are quite a stew; now the coronavirus ramps it up.

I was a social distance fan while I was in the grip of cancer treatment and I sort of liked it. Sort of.

If someone wanted to visit I said, “Okay, but I’m not wearing a mask. However, you’ll be wearing a mask, a kevlar suit, clean room booties, and get sprayed for lice and bed bugs before you get in the front door. Looking forward to seeing you.”

A stiff arm would have been better manners.

No one wants a Sting encore:

Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
I’ll be watching you

Every move you make
Every step you take
I’ll be watching you

I’ll be watching you

Can I get a stiff arm?