FIGHT TOGETHER, OR AGAINST EACH OTHER

Fight together if you have goals and aspirations.

Face it, going it alone is too hard.

A solitary life won’t understand how this works. Neither will a shallow life that bows to every new fad and flavor.

The problem for too many is what to do if they bow down so far they fall on their face.

Then what?

Maybe you’ve hard this said: “Whatever you do, don’t make the other guy look bad.”

But, when the other guy ties themselves to backward ideas and customs that have one guaranteed direction, down, be careful you don’t follow them.

Most of us know someone who as slipped and slid their way to bad outcomes. Probably more than one.

When my kids left for college I said, “Keep an eye out for the friend who goes overboard, gets too wasted to go to class, drops out and takes the first job that will have them.”

For that, I got the usual, “What’s that even supposed to mean?”

We dads are such a mystery.

I said, “Make sure it’s not you. I dropped out three times and got lucky finding a job that paid me to go back to school. That doesn’t always happen. Most companies are happy to plug you in and let you work until you can’t stand another minute.”

And I had the benefit of a sharp wife so we could attack my ignorance and fight together. Which brings up a question in some circles, “Why would such an impressive woman marry such a project?”

I like to answer with, “I married her to save the rest of the world from getting over-improved.”

Hilarity does not alway ensue.

Fight Together Against A Common Foe

Married people have it the hardest.

A commitment to stay together leaves plenty of room to fight together and fight each other.

But it’s subtle.

There may be a fight going on but only one of them knows it. That’s the partner who goes into shock when the other attacks.

Their response? “Where did that come from?”

That means they are on the ropes. It’s either time to go for the kill shot, or back it fuck off and explain what’s going on to the slower one.

The explanation, if it even happens, changes the conflict from fighting each other to fighting together.

At this point, don’t be the first to ask, “What did I do?”

You know what you did, at least you should know what you did.

If you do know, pretend it was something else. Solve a non-problem to practice up before getting into the meat of things.

Conflict resolution is a beautiful thing. But there are consequences, like making up.

Don’t wait on apologizing. Apologizing for what? It doesn’t matter.

Apologize as a way to take the gun out of the other’s hand. Do that and you won’t take any unnecessary fire.

Better to shield each other than duck and hide from each other.

What’s your plan?