OUTDOOR VOICE AND DIRT AT CHRISTMAS TREE FARM

An outdoor voice belongs outdoors. It’s louder and calls for attention.

Not so much a command voice to action, an outdoor voice still carries.

Is it the right voice for the parking lot at the Christmas tree farm? Probably not, but there’s more.

Following holiday traditions, the group gathered Sunday morning for the tree event.

This year didn’t include the axe that swung a little too close to a leg last year. A saw is safer.

What was included was a new baby, a grand baby, for the first time, which is another reason to leave the axe.

Before we caravanned away, part of the group talked about cars. It was between a SUV, mini-van, or pick-up truck.

One side held that mini-vans and SUV’s were at the top of the list, the other side went truck. Since we were heading to the tree farm in a truck, SUV, and sedan, the test was imminent.

Of three trees, two went in the back of the truck. I tied mine on top of my Highlander. It wasn’t fun. I’m a knot guy, square knot, half-hitch, the bowline knot that goes around the post and down the hole.

I keep a Boy Scout Manual for easy reference, but none of my knots were holding. So I re-tied, rearranged, and talked to myself in an outdoor voice.

A family pulled up, walked into the tree farm, cut a tree, and strapped it on their car and left while I was still tying.

The rest of the group left with a tree in the truck while I was still tying and fuming. It didn’t feel a lot like Christmas just then, it felt like more trouble than I remember. I’d become a slip knot guy.

What was wrong? All I wanted was an easy solution to tree transport and not be the sort of jackass whose tree falls off their car.

I strapped that tree down with cord and rope. If I’d had bungees, I would have used them, too. Was it tight enough?

I pulled out and headed home at a slow pace, but still the speed limit, with a motorcycle right behind me and a line of cars behind that as if the speed limit was a suggestion.

After enough traffic tickets I’ve learned my lesson on speed and stop signs. I thought I learned my lesson on knot tying too, for the sake of the motorcycle guy. Of all vehicles to follow me on tree day, that was the last one I expected.

Every corner was slow to keep the tree from sliding, along with slow starts and stops. Have you seen the people in a car with loose tree on top? They never know when it’s about to fly off.

Neither did I, but the motorcycle rider would know right away.

Outdoor Voice Of Christmas

With sixty five Christmases under my belt, I’ve got a good idea about the season. It’s a time to reflect on history, like the Pilgrims who must have had some sketchy times in the beginning.

One doesn’t ‘win’ Christmas at the tree farm, but a winning attitude is still important:

Do your best.

Don’t blame others if your best isn’t good enough.

Be of good cheer with an outdoor voice of love and support, but turn it down to an indoor voice if you find yourself mumbling to no one in particular while you screw around with the rope.

More later, so check back. In the meantime, mask up, wash up, and keep distance.