CANCER TALK: ANOTHER VOICE IN WINNING THE HEALTH GAME

Cancer talk changes depending on who does the talking.

Between one sort of cancer and the next, between terminal and curable, the talk changes.

When it comes from a public figure, it can get loud, or disappear. Coach Ron Rivera of the NFL team in Washington D.C. adds his voice to the cancer talk.

From nfl.com:

Ron Rivera’s cancer diagnosis came as a surprise, but the coach said Friday he’s ready to embrace the “opportunity to take care of this and be able to go forward.”

The Washington Football Team confirmed to NFL Network’s Mike Garafolo on Thursday that Rivera had been diagnosed with squamous cell cancer, a discovery that Rivera said on Friday upset him because he’d been paying closer attention to his health recently.

“Honestly I’m a little bit angry,” Rivera said. “I’m not quite sure how this happened. This is the healthiest I’ve felt in a long, long time. Honestly. I’ve lost some weight. I’ve been working out and doing things the right way.

“I’m not quite sure how this happened.”

From ESPN.com:

“I have a great saying that I really do appreciate. It’s called don’t draw me a map unless you’ve been there,” Rivera said. “Jack has been there and has been very helpful. … It shows you the importance of having that kind of guy around. Now in the circumstances we have, his value for us is even more so.”

Coach Rivera was talking about his top assistant coach in Washington. He understands how to ask for help.

I’ll lean on my youth sports coaching career to draw a cancer map:

Dear Ron,

We’ve never met, but you called on me when you reported squamous cell cancer in your neck. The map I’ll draw is a result of the places I’ve been. You may follow my steps. If I were you, I’d follow.

Since you’ve disclosed the reality of neck cancer, then you’ve been through the grind. From scans to fine needles to treatment options, it becomes a blur of over-information.

Most likely you’ve been deluged with ideas from medical amateurs and professionals. You know how to deal with amateurs, it’s the professionals you need to keep an eye on.

If an oncologist recommends a course of three different chemo brands, along with a chemo pump, be sure to get a second opinion. The second opinion may be similar to the one I got, that excluded two of the chemos and the pump.

If part of the chemo recommendations include installing a port in your chest, instead of a line hooked into your arm, consider this: I spoke to a former cancer patient about chemo. She said she had an IV, not a port, and had no problems.

As our conversation continued, she said her arm puffed up to twice its size on chemo day, and that she couldn’t lift her arm over her head since then. With that said, take the port.

By now you’re had some insurance adventures. If not, be prepared. Call your insurer frequently to ensure coverage on treatment days. An administrative mistake canceled my insurance the day of my first chemo. As if getting a load of hot sauce wasn’t unnerving enough.

Cancer Talk With Cancer Pals

Some high profile guys like you have come forward with cancer talk. Not all of them talk about the same thing. That part is up to you.

What you should do, and if I was your cancer coach you would, embrace the moment you share in this process. Be friendly with the check-in staff, the nurses, the techs. Most of all, reach out to people getting treatment. This doesn’t mean you’ll find life long friends, but you might. The goal is to look forward to getting treatment, even when you don’t. And you won’t, eventually.

But, like you expect your players to listen and respond, get in there. You’re the new guy and everything will be strange. The best advice I got when I asked what the heck is someone like me to do? Give in. Who am I? Not a quitter.

At 6’3″, currently 220 lbs, I was a high school nose tackle, state wrestling champ and all-American, and a one year college wrestler. I joined the Army for a try-out with the All-Army wrestling team. I took my wins and losses in stride, ran a bunch of road races, one marathon, one Hood-To-Coast. I got married two years after you. My wife and I have two sons.

At sixty-five, I’m a few years older than you. I started and finished treatment in 2017. I look forward to the All-Clear at the fifth year anniversary, since I’m All-Clear now. You’ll be doing the same in five years.

Coping With Cancer Talk

Coping Magazine is an industry publication found in treatment waiting rooms. This is an essay I wrote for it.

Huffington Post ran an interview I did with Pamela Tom with HPV&me. This is an essay I wrote for ShotByShot.org.

New neck cancer guys sometimes need a booster. You might be one of them. If you’ve asked questions that don’t have answers you can live with, leave them in comments and I’ll do what I can.