NATIONAL SIBLINGS DAY FORGETS THE ONLY CHILD

Does National Siblings Day mean anything to an only child?

I’ve heard talk from only children, about how they long for a brother or sister, how much they miss family when they see others together.

If you have brothers and sisters, and hear an adult only child whine about their aloneness, what is your response?

Try not to share too much with them. They don’t need to know what they missed.

They didn’t grow up with an older sibling who took on the role of a third parent to the younger siblings?

It’s worse if the oldest is also a snitch who tells on their brothers and sisters.

And don’t tell the adult only child about sharing everything because they never had to share anything. If something came in a pairs, they got both.

Try and avoid the topic of hand-me-downs, too. Only children never get hand me downs; they’ve had to break in new stuff all by themselves. Not easy.

When you hear this: “I miss having someone to share the joy of Christmas and Easter,” there’s no need to remind them about the other 363 days. Those are the days where things add up to spending holidays alone, when you or others screw up enough to be excluded from family events.

An only child never has those inclusive feelings, but somehow thinks of them as cherished memories that make life complete.

Hidden Memories On Siblings Day

All brothers or sisters have asked this question: “Have you seen my (fill in the blank.)”

And they’ve heard the same answer: “No, but I’ll keep any eye out for it.”

What happens when one finds the missing thing hidden away on the other’s side of the room?

Only children never have one side of a room; they have the whole room, and nothing ever goes missing. Misplaced, maybe, but not missing.

Who hasn’t shared a fond memory with a sibling only to find they remember things differently. Who is right and who is wrong? An only child might not be right all the time, but they don’t have anyone telling them they’re wrong, either.

Traditionally, National Siblings Day is a time to re-establish the pecking order from the past. When they do it right, the oldest is still the boss and the youngest is still the baby. Everyone else is just filler.

At least that’s how it works with two kids. Add that third and someone gets stuck in the middle-child spin cycle. It’s the whine cycle, the snivel cycle, that produces jewels like, “How come they got the bigger half” and, “Why do they always get the good stuff?”

Younger kids may develop an attitude if the oldest makes a point of rubbing their status in their faces. You know them when you hear them try and explain things. It comes with something extra, like they grew up being ignored and now want to make sure they’re heard loud and clear.

Only children have always been the center of attention ‘miracle child’ if their parents are worth a damn. But is being ‘worth a damn’ as a parent the same as Tiger Mom style?

Only if the rules get followed and they never:

were never allowed to do:

– attend a sleepover
– have a playdate
– be in a school play
– complain about not being in a school play
– watch TV or play computer games
– choose their own extracurricular activities
– get any grade less than an A
– not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama
– play any instrument other than the piano or violin
– not play the piano or violin.

The Middle Sibling

The sibling in the middle holds the best spot to observe others. They see how the older one operates and have the freedom to change their own path.

Middle sibs role model for youngers, who make the same departure from the eldest’s habits, sometimes with spectacular results.

When the younger siblings copy the middle child, do they ever give credit where it’s due? Because the oldest is still boss, the baby gets to slide by like everything is their idea, so no credit.

An only child doesn’t have to adapt to siblings as they all change and mature.

They have no one to tease about gaining weight, going bald, growing a bad beard. No one to give their advice to, no one to give them advice.

Sibling Advice?

What’s the best siblings day advice to give, and take?

“You don’t understand, and never have. Mr. Trump is like a doctor for the country, better than a doctor. He may say he’s not a doctor, but I’d follow his lead if I were you.”

“Don’t vote democrat, don’t vote blue, unless you want all of the good things Mr. Trump has done, and done so quickly, to go away. They will tax and spend us into socialism. By the way, have you got the recovery check yet?”

“Marriage is just a piece of official legal paper, not a document to stop men from having fun. It’s not wrong to hire personal entertainment when the wife is out of town.”

“No, I don’t have enough gum for everyone, and if I did I’d still keep it all for myself. What’re you gonna do, huh, tell on me like you always have?”

“Mom always liked me best.”

That last one is the best. If you have kids, tell them all you like them best.

If you didn’t know, now you know.