PORTLAND SUPER BOWL PRIMER WITH CHINESE NEW YEAR

Oregon Historical Society celebrates Chinese New Year before Portland Super Bowl.

The Super Bowl date has been set for years.

The only mystery is who will play the game.

Unless you live in Portland, Oregon.

Then you have more to do besides grill some cow and chug beers.

In Portland you need something special before joining the other 100,000,000 fans in front of a screen.

Sunday, Chinese New Year, and parade to honor it sponsored by the Oregon Historical Society did the trick.

If you live with people who are luke warm at best during football season, you need to prepare for each Sunday by doing something more important.

Like Chinese New Year Parade.

Being a Chinese New Year parade, Sunday’s event started in Chinatown then headed straight up 3rd Ave.

Police on motorcycles blocked each intersection.

“Look at us, cruising through red lights in the middle of the street with policemen watching.”

How much fun is that? Not a protest, not a statement, just a celebration.

There’s something special about people in the street instead of cars. And the walk up SW 3rd is a good warm up for a Portland Super Bowl.

If you want to break a sweat before the game, push a wheelchair from 3rd and Burnside, right turn on Jefferson and head uphill to Broadway.

That’s where you’ll find the Oregon Historical Society.

On Super Bowl Sunday it was easy to find. Just follow the dancing dragon.

At the top of Jefferson turn right on SW Park.

My crew and I hung in the park blocks while the dragon shimmied it’s way toward the museum entrance.

Did I mention this was all part of Portland Super Bowl preparations? Did I mention I was the only one in the loop?

Listen, no one wants to feel condescended to. Sports fans get it all the time with, “why do  you waste time watching grown men play kid games,” like there’s a rational answer.

We’re not reliving our past where we played varsity football for three years and won only four games. No one relives that, they move on.

Guys who didn’t buckle that chin strap and stick their head in there might be reliving something, but it’s not football.

My group didn’t need to know I was trading the morning and early afternoon for an uninterrupted beer-fest and football the rest of the day.

We were all together for the Portland Super Bowl primer because we’re fans of diverse culture.

It was a good push up Jefferson, worthy of the old Rough Rider himself. Make that two Rough Riders.

Just like game time is a crucial moment, so is regional history. Even if you know it all, you don’t.

Any chance you get to join museum activities will make you better informed, smarter.

The dancing dragon headed to the history deck in full swing. The people making it happen had to feel like they played a full game, just without the headache.

This was about the time the Portland Super Bowl cat got out of the bag.

“Let’s see the exhibit?”

“No time for that.”

“It’s not even one o’clock. They don’t close until five.”

“We’ve got things to do.”

“Like what?”

I reviewed the list in my mind: make a beer run, finish the bean dip off, get chicken wings in the oven.

Married people do this all the time. It’s part of the fun, seeing if you spouse can detect your intentions.

“Uh, it’s the last Sunday of the NFL season. Two teams have one more game. The Denver Broncos play the Carolina Panthers.”

“So what. If it’s not the Cowboys, why do you care?”

Then I took off my coat.

“Honey, the Cowboys are always playing.”

And away we went.

About the game: Someone once said, “Show me a good loser and I’ll show you a loser.”

Was Cam Newton a sore loser? Don’t you sort of hope he’d be?

This player will be the face of the NFL for the next decade. Instead of a polished, corporate friendly, representative, he knows his game and when to stay, when to go.

After getting crushed over and over to the point of not recognizing a loose ball on the ground in front of him, he didn’t have much to say afterward.

What could he say besides the usual? It’s too soon after the biggest game of a guy’s life to expect them to show up nice and sweet.

Give it a rest.

Halftime show? The Coldplay guy looked like he had a bad back, all hunched over and trying to walk.

He didn’t want to tower over Bruno Mars? Beyonce did it instead.

Was her show some kind of statement, or a tribute to Tina Turner?

Someone explain to Rudy Giuliani that taking shots a Beyonce isn’t his job.

She’s show business, big show business. Stop riding her coattails, Rudy.

And Lady Gaga’s National Anthem? If she didn’t make you tear up a little, you must hate America.

Next to Marvin Gaye, her version is the best.